AD LIBS: Potifaar’s Wife Wants Josef, He Says No & Lands In Kirikiri

Genisees 39:

7: And it happened that after all these happenings, his master’s wife started eyeing him. One day, she went to wear the new lingerie her husband bought for her and went to Josef’s room and said, ”Oga, make we lamba.” And she brought out a Rough Rider condom.

8: But Josef had just lost N1million inside the just-crashed MMM. And he said, ”Madam, please stop shey bee! Besides, I cannot come and eat inside my Oga’s agbalumo.”

9: ”Oga has given me everything I need. It won’t be fair.”

10. But she tried to talk him into it. Day after day. But Josef was a very stubborn young man.

11. But one day, the two of them were alone in the house. Nobody else was at home.

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SMOKING HEAD!

[a loose adaptation of K-Baq’s MARASÁKÀ!]

LAGOS. MONDAY MORNING. IN A DANFO.

JASPER: Abeg, who dey sing Awilo?
PASSENGER 1: [chuckles] Awilo Logomba?
JASPER: [raises voice] I say who dey sing?! Who dey mime dat Awilosong?
WOMAN: Bros, nobody dey sing. Or shey na dat baba wey dey snore close to the window U dey talk?
JASPER: Driver, abeg off dat radio… e too loud.
DRIVER: Radio? You get ebola? Abi na for wia U dey hear radio? Abeg my people, I on radio?
PASSENGERS: No oh! Continue reading